opening doors

I am in the habit of opening doors, journeying into the unknown. "Leaving in a month," I say. And I am asked, "Will you come back to Tahoe after Sweden." I reply, "Who knows, I'm opening doors." And I motion the opening of double armoire doors. I like that image, like entering into Narnia. Love the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. I swear I've been to Narnia. I also really believe I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus. The first door I opened this morning, I actually more unzipped as I emerged from my back deck tent in a too fast developing, unaffordable, yet wilderness rich and playground plentiful Truckee, California. I let myself sleep longer and the sun was high. I opened the door into my home. Monique, my sustainable cohort from college and Liz, who we met at our "Be the freak that you are party" live inside. Jolene does too, but I think Charlie's bed is way more comfortable. She's seldom home. I ate some fresh watermelon and salad, a bit of homemade kombucha- a high ph way to start the day. Well done. Later I drank fairtrade, organic, and yes acidic coffee from Jen and Glenn's little slice of bliss at The Dam Cafe. It was mildly sweet and tasted good. I came to Tahoe City today via public transport. $1.50. I walked to the farthest bus stop because it was hot, I was early and there is no formal, "this is a nice place to sit in the shade, smell the flowers and wait for the bus" stop. Just a sign and some asphalt. I called the transportation office the day it rained. I was emotionally involved in our public transportaion system from that day forward. He explained to me that there is simply is not enough money to run the bus during rush hour. I argued that the chicken and egg dilemma will prove itself if you actually ran the bus when people were going to work. I stretched out my arm to catch a ride at the bus stop. I mean bus sign. Whatever comes first, ride or bus, I'll take it. I like hitching--sharing a story or two. The success and failure of getting or not getting a ride. The mild and meaningless rejection is like a vaccination shot. I'm working on being immune to rejection- some childhood thing. The bus came first. 10:38 , every two hours.

I gave a Slovakian girl $5 yesterday, because hitch hiking is really carpooling or ride sharing. The not so funny thing was that I dropped my wallet in the street as I insisted on paying. I think she wanted me to the keep my money. She was gifting me a ride and she felt good in that gesture of sharing time with a kindred spirit. Instead, I wanted the kudos unconsciously and tossed the money at her. Oh yes clever me. And then I got bit in the ass when I went to buy a coffee, and had no wallet. Good, mild lesson, because an honest lad named Tom dropped off my little black wallet where I work at the BridgeTender the next day.......and I could go to the Wisdom show and flash my ID that says I was 28, no, not under 21. I was given a free ticket to Wisdom at the Yellowman show a few weeks back, I think because I was having so much fun and I owe that to Yellowman. He has that contagious raw high energy that flows into the crowd. Last night, after riding my bike from Tahoe City along the Truckee River path in the dark, with only glimpses of a tree line, I cashed in my Wisdom ticket and plugged into a hip-hop reggae vibe with political and positive lyrics. Beyond the riverside outdoor venue hung the waning moon and a baby black bear was apparently frightend into in a pine tree at the entrance.

The bus ride is an hour for the 12 miles from Truckee to Tahoe City, but I bring a book, Starhawk's, Dreaming the Dark: Magic, Sex, and Politics. Today I read about group facilitation and consensus, a nonhierachal method for determing the vision and choosing an action. Starhawk, political activist, vigilent protester, witch, author, and mycoremediator permaculture goddess has used consensus over 100 times and in situations where issues were emotionally charged and of immediate importance. The keys to a sucessful consensus process are a great facilitator, small groups, like affinity groups and a central hub, where information can flow from and to. Ideally, a well-informed population, with open minds and open hearts would allow the collective consciousness of the group to channel throughout the process. I want to give consenus decision making a go, although a debriefing would be necessry because our hierarchal systems have not allowed people to feel that their voices can be heard, nor are their needs are met. I generally feel powerless against the seemingly complex and untouchable decision makers. Rounds, where each person within the group may voice concerns and ask questions, would be more time consuming at first, but more efficient in the long run, because communication lines are open and needs are addressed before the final decision is agreed upon. Thus there is greater participation in the completion of the chosen decision as each member in the group is emotionally and directly responsible for the group decision. I assume this would move meetings from the visioning stages to the action stages more quickly. I have been to numerous commmunity visioning sessions, where there has been no follow-up meeting and no action. We need a Natural Step frameworkand its 4 Conditions, laying out the basis of what already is, so we can move into the imtimate relationship that is action.